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Title_Array=new Array(

"NOW BACK BY POPULAR DEMAND",
"WORD TO YOUR MOTHER",
"READING THIS SITE DAILY UNCLOGS PORES.  IT'S TRUE.",
"380CC'S OF PURE DEMONIC POWER",
"BECAUSE HUMANITY WAS BETTER OFF PAGAN",
"BACK UP IN YOUR ASS WITH THE RESURRECTION",
"BECAUSE EVERYTHING ON THE INTERNET IS TRUE",
"SUBTLE LIKE A MULTIPLE ORGASM",
"BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT YOUR FUCKING KHAKIS",
"TODAY'S SPECIAL: LAME POSTS WITH A SIDE OF USELESS DRIVEL",
"BECAUSE YOU SHOULD TAKE ADVICE FROM A COMMERCIAL OVER YOUR DOCTOR",
"HAVING FUN STORMING THE CASTLE",
"TAX, TIPS, DESTINATION CHARGES NOT INCLUDED",
"INFINITELY FUCKING EPIC",
"GRAPHICS?  WE DON'T NEED NO STINKIN' GRAPHICS!",
"HAVE YOU BEEN TO CLUB LA VELA?  OH, FREE PANCAKES!",
"BECAUSE RESTAURANTS INSIDE CONVENIENCE STORES ARE JUST WRONG",
"OPEN 24 HOURS A DAY, 7 DAYS A WEEK",
"SMUGGLING ARESOL CHEESE THROUGH TUNNELS SINCE 1941",
"BLURRING THE EDGES SO THEY BLEND TOGETHER PROPERLY",
"NOW WITH MORE TAGLINES THAN YOU CAN SHAKE A STICK AT",
"BECAUSE SOMETIMES CHAIRS CAN DOUBLE AS GENE REPLICATORS",
"COME FOR THE POSTS.  STAY FOR THE FRIENDLY ATMOSPHERE.",
"BECAUSE THE AVERAGE PERSON HAS ONE BALL AND ONE TIT",
"BECAUSE I DREAM OF PUPPET SHOWS AND CANDY CANES",
"YOUR SOURCE FOR STORIES ABOUT CASTRATION AND SEX WITH FURNITURE",
"BECAUSE NYQUIL MAKES A DANDY EGGNOG",
"DECLARED \"INFAMOUS\" IN FRANKLIN COUNTY",
"GETTING STUPIDER BY THE MINUTE",
"BECAUSE YOU SHOULD STOP FOR SCHOOL BUSSES",
"LOUD AND PROUD!",
"NOW VIEWABLE ON YOUR CELLPHONE OR PDA!",
"YOUR SOURCE FOR SEXY SPRAINED ANKLE PHOTOS",
"WINNER OF ZERO PRESTIGIOUS AWARDS!",
"I'M FROM FISH LAKE",
"THERE'S NOTHING PROPER ABOUT MY PROPAGANDA",
"BECAUSE SOAKING CUBED CHEESE HAS NO PLACE IN A SINK",
"MAKING YOUR THINGS MY THINGS BY WAY OF LOOTING",
"NOW REZONED AS PART OF THE FARMINGTON DISTRICT",
"SHUT YOUR MOUTH. MIND YOUR BUSINESS.",
"IF ACCIDENTALLY SWALLOWED, CONTACT A PHYSICIAN",
"NOW IN TECHINCOLOR! &reg;",
"GETTING BACK SOCKS FROM GOAT BASTARDS SINCE 1997",
"BECAUSE THE ONLY REAL WAY TO BOWL IS CANDLEPIN",
"BEING MORE OR LESS SPECIFIC EVERY DAY",
"WHERE NUMBERS COUNT FOR NOTHING",
"YOUR COWORKERS WILL BE TALKING ABOUT THIS TOMORROW.  BE INFORMED.",
"AN ICON OF SELF-INDULGENCE",
"BECAUSE NO ONE CAN DEFEAT THE QUAD LASER!",
"BECAUSE NOSTALGIA AIN'T WHAT IT USED TO BE",
"NOISE, NOISE, NOISE, POSTING LINKS, POSTING LINKS...",
"GETTING MORE PEOPLE TO READ USING STRONG-ARM TACTICS",
"BECAUSE EROTIC GAY FAN FICTION WILL GIVE YOU THE RUNS",
"POWERED BY THE NEW HYPERSPEED PENTILON 7 CHIP!",
"BECAUSE MAXJEROME.NET SPARES YOU OF STUPID ANIMATIONS AND FLASH INTROS",
"BEACUSE BASKET #10 CAN GO TO HELL",
"NEWS YOU CAN USE FROM \"A CREDIBLE JOURNALIST\"",
"THE TIME OF THE PURIFICATION HAS COME",
"NOT ILLEGIBLE, JUST ILLEGITAMATE",
"BECAUSE THIS SITE EMITS PHERMONES",
"PLANNING TO BE SPONTANEOUS TOMORROW",
"C'MON... EVERYBODY'S BOOKMARKING IT...",
"BECAUSE \"FREESTYLE WALKING\" IS COMING BACK, BABY",
"BECAUSE YOU CAN PLANT SAUSAGE SEEDS",
"BEING KIND TO 56K MODEM USERS EVERYWHERE",
"THIS PAGE IS MADE WITH 100% RECYCLED PHOTONS AND ELECTRONS",
"BECAUSE YOU NEED A BOOK WITH ALL OF THE PAC-MAN ROUTES IN IT",
"SETTING BEACONS AT WAYPOINTS EVERYWHERE",
"SOON TO BE MADE INTO A MAJOR MOTION PICTURE!",
"WARNING!  REMOVAL OF THIS TAGLINE IS PROHIBITED BY LAW!",
"PROMOTER OF CELTIC MUSIC ACROSS THE GREATER TRI-STATE AREA",
"THE NIGHT TIME IS THE RIGHT TIME",
"OH MY HEART, BUB!");


number_of_quotes = 72; // 73 quotes, but array starts at 0, not 1
theDate = new Date();
day = theDate.getDate();
month = theDate.getMonth() + 1;
year = theDate.getYear() + 1900;
dayofyear = 0;


if      (month == 1)  {dayofyear = 0 + day;} 
else if (month == 2)  {dayofyear = 31 + day;} 
else if (month == 3)  {dayofyear = 59 + day;} 
else if (month == 4)  {dayofyear = 90 + day;} 
else if (month == 5)  {dayofyear = 120 + day;} 
else if (month == 6)  {dayofyear = 151 + day;} 
else if (month == 7)  {dayofyear = 181 + day;} 
else if (month == 8)  {dayofyear = 212 + day;} 
else if (month == 9)  {dayofyear = 243 + day;} 
else if (month == 10) {dayofyear = 273 + day;} 
else if (month == 11) {dayofyear = 304 + day;} 
else                  {dayofyear = 334 + day;} 


if ((year%4 == 0) && (month >= 3)) {dayofyear += 1;}

todays_quote = --dayofyear % number_of_quotes;
todays_quote = Title_Array[todays_quote];

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